My girlfriend Carrie Underwood finally decided to stop cheating on me with Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo. JUST KIDDING! But seriously though, the two really have ended their relationship. Apparantly Tony told Carrie that he wants to put their relationship on hold during his football season – NOT the first time he has wanted his “space”. I guess that means I have from September until January to make my move!

Alex Rodriguez was caught spending time with a big-boobed blonde in Toronto this past weekend. The two were seen having dinner at the Harbour Sixty Steakhouse and were also spotted at the Four Seasons Hotel where A-Rod had a room. I’m sure Cynthia, his wife and mother of their 2 1/2 year-old-daughter isn’t too happy about this. Doesn’t A-rod know better than to go out in public with the woman he’s cheating on his wife with? He was just asking to get caught! Now his wife is probably going to leave him and take half of his hundreds of millions of dollars. Dumbass.

Nicole Richie sent out an outrageous email on May 24th inviting friends to a Memorial Day bash.

From: Nicole Richie

To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Subject: Masha and Nicole’s Memorial Day Party Date: Thu 24 Ma 2007 04:29:29 +0000

My fellow Americans its that time of year To celebrate our country by drinking massive amounts of beer Let’s stand together as one, live the American dream Take shots, pass out, & wake up with our pants ripped open at the seems Let’s glorify this day in your sluttiest tops and your tightest pair of tsubi jeans Even though we have no fucking clue what Memorial Day really means!!

Mashas House
Sunday May 28th, at 2pm
XXXXX Crest Court
Beverly Hills, Ca 90210

There will be a scale at the front door. No girls over 100 pounds allowed in. Start starving yourself now. See you all then!!!

Please make sure to RSVP as this is a large party and we need to keep track of who’s coming. Thanks

Nicole’s publicist claims she was just trying to be funny in the email but no one seems to be finding it funny at all. Nicole is way too skinny herself to be making jokes like that. Coming from someone who looks like she could collapse at any moment her comments were definitly not ok.

Lindsay Lohan crashed her car at 5:30 am this morning. She was busted by police and charged with DUI. Not only that but the LAPD is now revealing that cocaine was found in the party girl’s car. LiLo is in for some serious trouble now that she will face felony charges for the illegal narcotics found in the car on top of the drunk driving dilemma. Can’t Lindsay afford a driver? The consequences of this out of control party girl’s bad decisions seem to be even worse than just with the law. Svedka Vodka has now pulled out of their deal to sponser Lohan’s 21st birthday party planned for July 2-3 at Caesers Palace in Las Vegas. Isn’t she supposed to be in AA? Why is a Vodka company sponsoring her birthday anyway?

Who knew Wet’n Wild waterpark hires a bunch of Nazi security guards!!??

I flew down to Orlando to meet up with my friends for the day and we went to the waterpark for some sun and fun.  As we were lounging by the wave pool enjoying our 4th or 5th beer (who’s counting), a team of security came over and started interrogating us.  And since we didn’t have our ID’s on us (who carries their ID to go in the pool??), they started making comments like “We are going to charge you with underage drinking.” and “You have to come and stay in the office with us.”

I said “I don’t have to go anywhere, you don’t have any authority to detain me. I repute that charge!” And the Nazi head of Security was like “Repute? I’m glad you know that word.” and I’m like flipping out at this point.  I said “I graduated from Carnegie Mellon, I know more words than that! That’s why I’m not working at a waterpark!”

lol yea, insulting the head of security didn’t get us anywhere.  So I got kicked out of Wet’n Wild – after I already got sun-burnt Not Hot at all!

17-Years Old Jordin Sparks became the youngest American Idol ever. She beat out fellow Idol opponent Blake Lewis (famous for his beat-boxing on the show) in a 74 million vote showdown.

Jordin is my homegirl from Glendale, Arizona. Way to represent!! Here’s her finale performance of “This Is My Now“, watching it still gives me the chills!!

Apolo Ohno, America’s favorite Speed Skating Olympic Star is the winner of this season’s Dancing with the Stars on ABC, beating out opponent Joey Fatone from N-Snyc. I always wondered how Joey was allowed on the show since he definitely has had professional dance training while he was in the boyband…

Anyway, the highlight of the show to me isn’t the final crowning of Apolo as America’s favorite B-list celeb dancer, but rather this hilarious skid by Jimmy Kimmel…

This has been a harsh weekend for Britney Spears. First, she got on a United Flight yesterday heading to Orlando for her performance, only to discover that there’s NO LEATHER SEATS in First Class on United!!  I mean how dare they!!  After throwing a tantrum she asked to leave the plane only minutes before departure.  What a brat! lol I’ve flown plenty of times in First Class without leather seats (but maybe I should throw a tantrum too and maybe just maybe, if all the First Class passengers do it, they will think twice before putting cloth seats in First Class again!!)

Actually the part that annoys me the most is most airlines don’t serve Champagne in First Class on domestic flights, which totally goes against what Fergie sings in her song “Glamorous” lol.

Anyway, back to Britney.  After finally reaching Orlando and getting on stage at the House of Blues,  she was caught lip-syncing to her own songs because the back track started skipping!!  How very Ashlee Simpson?!! lol it’s not that we didn’t know that Britney lip-syncs, but COME ON!! It’s like 2007!!  Why are people still carrying back tracks on CD?? Put it on your iPod and plug that straight into the board!!! We were doing that like 5 years ago for our artists lol.

All in all, a not so hot weekend for Brit Brit.

It’s one of my business partner Mike K’s birthday. We did this huge party for him at Stereo (where else? lol) We got 300 ballons to fill up the whole club, and the big celebrity guest of the night – Fergie came after her Z100 Zootopia concert and sang a couple of her songs at the club! Also Perez Hilton was there too hiding in the back corner booth obviously high on SOMETHING! I took a picture of him and two of my friends, he was nice at first, then I guess whatever he was taking kicked in and he started being an asshole (suprise suprise) to the girls cuz he was probably in a “__-hole” . But he does looks like he’s about to drool in the picture, lol kinda funny.

Other celebs attended the “Stereo by the Shore” party include Marc Jacobs, Sarah from America’s Next Top Model, Fabrizio Moretti of The Strokes, Keenan, and Elias Koteas from the movie Shooter (who apparently took my friend’s number and left her a vm… lol)
(click on the pictures to enlarge)

Xtina just got the go ahead from the Ministry of Culture in China to perform this summer in Shanghai as part of her world tour. Yay for my hometown!

This is huge news because the Chinese government is notorious for censoring content and media, and has frequently rejected requests for foreign artists to perform in China, including most recently Jay-Z.

I guess the Xtina camp was worried at first that they won’t get approved cuz of her sexual/racy past performances (remember Dirrrty?) But apparently the good old boys at the Ministry of Culture quite enjoyed it

She’s set to perform on June 26th at the Grand Stage, where the Rolling Stones, Eric Clapton, and the Black Eyed Peas all have performed before. Tickets are selling from $26 to $260, which is a lot of Yuans when you think about it.

I wish I was going back this summer. I bet my cousins all are getting front row and backstage. No fair! lol